The Impact of Parenting Styles on Student Behaviour and Learning Engagement

Over years of teaching in both universities and school classrooms, I’ve noticed one truth that continually surfaces: a child’s behaviour and approach to learning are deeply influenced by the parenting styles they experience at home.

In this blog, I want to share some insights and reflections on how parenting shapes students personality, classroom engagement, and long-term growth.

1. Children Mirror Their Parents

You’ve probably heard the saying: “The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.” In education, this couldn’t be more accurate.

Children bring more than books and laptops into the classroom – they bring habits, attitudes, and emotional frameworks shaped by home life. Kids are keen observers. They may not always follow instructions, but they absorb everything: how their parents manage stress, how they treat others, and how they model honesty, kindness, and responsibility.

• Positive influence: When parents model honesty, resilience, and kindness, children often reflect those same traits in class. They’re open to feedback, cooperative with peers, and more consistent in their academic work. Emotional security translates into focus, confidence, and perseverance.

• Negative influence: Conversely, if children grow up in environments where inconsistency, manipulation, or avoidance of responsibility is common, they often bring those patterns into the classroom. Such students may appear distracted, hesitant, or distrustful—not because they lack ability, but because they’re navigating school with an inherited behavioural compass shaped by uncertainty.

2. Kids Act Differently When Parents Are Watching

An interesting phenomenon I’ve observed is how students change their behaviour when parents are in the room.

In coding workshops, children who are usually independent may suddenly become anxious, quiet, or overly reliant on their parents. Why? Because when a parent is present, learning can feel like a performance rather than exploration.

That’s why we encourage parents to observe quietly and avoid intervening, allowing children to remain in their natural learning mindset.

3. Helicopter Parenting vs. Independence

All parents want to protect their children, but overprotection often hinders growth.

• Helicopter parenting: When parents manage every detail of a child’s life, these students often hesitate to take initiative, avoid risks, and constantly seek approval.

• Encouraging independence: Children given space to take age-appropriate risks learn resilience, problem-solving, and creativity. In coding (and life), the willingness to try, fail, and try again is invaluable.

4. Real-Life Reflections: Alex and Beth

To illustrate, here are two fictionalised examples based on recurring patterns:

• Alex comes from a home where honesty and kindness are core values. His parents praise effort over perfection. In class, Alex is cooperative, open to mistakes, and willing to learn.

• Beth experiences inconsistency at home, with shifting rules and unclear boundaries. In class, she’s cautious, easily distracted, and hesitant to trust.

Both children are intelligent. But their classroom engagement reflects the values they’ve absorbed at home.

5. What Can Parents and Educators Do?

• For Parents: Balance structure with freedom. Model honesty, kindness, and responsibility. Allow children to take risks and make decisions. Remember—kids learn more from what we do than what we say.

• For Teachers: Look beyond behaviour to understand students’ backgrounds. Encourage effort and risk-taking, and normalise mistakes as part of learning. Keep communication open with parents to align expectations.

Final Thoughts

Parenting casts a long shadow. The behaviours, values, and emotional habits modelled at home shape how children engage with school and life.

By working together—parents, teachers, and students—we can nurture learners who are not only capable coders but also kind, independent, and emotionally strong individuals.